Dear ex-wife

It sure is nice not to have to deal with you lately. I couldn’t be anymore proud of hubby for shutting you down and I’m sure you couldn’t be any more heartbroken about it. I know you are at your house everyday fretting and worrying about what you said or done to deserve this sort of treatment. And that suits me fine because God knows you have put me through enough and it’s time for it to come back on you. Four years of your games, manipulation tactics and using your son as a weapon against my marriage. You have put me through hell lady and you know it. Ah…karma…

It saddens me that we will never get along. I would like to for the “sake of the child” and I can honestly say I have tried. I don’t usually allow people who double cross me, backstab me or have it out for me in general be in my life, but I swallowed that for my stepson.

Anyone else I would have wrote off a long time ago. Now, after all the underhanded approaches you have took, the obsessing about my husband, me, my friends and my CHILDREN you are now wrote off like you deserve.

And I really do hate it. I would like to have a relationship with you, but you made that impossible.

When you text me the other day trying to apologize and do what you like to call being the “bigger person” I wanted to text back and explain myself and then I remembered how far you took it with the CRAZY.  To find out you were practically chasing  my child around offering him drinks when I wasn’t there floored me. STAY AWAY FROM MY CHILD. I have taken a lot from you. This I will not tolerate. I do good by your son. Don’t mess up and start stalking my teenage son like you stalk me and my husband. And asking MY son’s stepmother about me??
A woman you don’t even KNOW?? It’s funny because I told her you would.

I wanted to take my son to the same camp but couldn’t bc I knew you would be there stepping up the crazy and I told her that. True to form, you did exactly what I told her you would.

In one word, dealing with you is: exhausting.

I’m not angry- I don’t have the capacity to be mad at you anymore.  I’m not sad- I bear no loss over the lack of contact with you.

I’m not threatened by you- I may have second guessed a few times, but I am certain that you are nothing to my husband other than SS mother and that is all. My ex’s and I get along wonderfully and are one big, extended family. We care for each other and will do anything to support or help one another. You will never have this relationship with my husband bc he cannot stand you and it’s all bc of your ways.

I wish you would just stop. Just be normal for awhile. Just be nice to me and stop with the underhanded drama like listing your husband as stepson’s father in the newspaper. So low. But thanks by the way because if hubby wasn’t seeing what you were trying to pull, he saw it then and instantly became less toleratant of your mess. (yeah I know you put it in the paper forever ago but we just recently found it online when I searched for his name) Stop obsessing and asking friends of mine, or just random people who might know me about me. Deal with the fact that you and your ex husband (my husband) will never be together again. I have been in your shoes. I can sympathize with you but I can assure you, there is not one doubt in my mind that he simply does not sit
around pining over you. SS told me you liked that song “lips of an angel”. I listened to it. I suppose you can have your dreams and fantasies but that is all you get. Do you need clarification that he really doesn’t care? Will that help close the door for you?

1) he never talks about you. Ever. Not good stuff. Not bad.
2) He tells me that he has never found anyone in the world like me and that he is the luckiest man alive.
3) he is a better man to me than he was to you. That should be the nail on the head. Obvious?

Honey, we are not unhappy, we are not on the edge of divorce, he does not go out all the time and leave me at home like he did you because he was so miserable he HAD to leave. We have our fights (as I’m sure SS has told you bc I’m sure you grill the poor child for info about what happens here when he comes back to your house) but who doesn’t fight. And mostly….we both enjoy the making up too much not to fight sometimes! So, sorry to dash your hopes and dreams but I thought you could use some clarification. After all, it has been 4 years and you
still wont quit.

Maybe one day we can get along. I would like that. My SS Needs that. So please turn the volume down on the crazy tuner and just chill for awhile. Once I see that you are truly over it and no longer stalking people then we can work on the relationship your son needs. But until then I’m just going to have to continue to ignore you bc your presence and schemes are so unsettling. When the time is right, I will extend the olive branch to you and see if we are ok now.

~ by Stepfamily Letter Project on July 28, 2010.

2 Responses to “Dear ex-wife”

  1. well said …. many dont know how to move on many years later .

  2. sounds like we have the same BM in our situations! GET OVER IT ALREADY is what im screaming but like u said they cant turn down the crazy long enough to hear it lol…ugh.

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