Dear Husband’s Ex Wife
I am sorry that you are upset. You must be under a lot of stress right now to write such nasty emails. While I appreciate you taking the time to write me an email describing your concerns over my actions, this nit-picking is entirely uncalled for.
Thank you for making us aware that my Husband’s Child was in the Emergency Room. We were very concerned. I am sorry that you felt that I was monopolizing my 4-year-old Stepdaughter’s time during her confinement. If you felt that this was inappropriate (and, I want you to know that Wayne was fine with it) I wish you would have said something to me. I was preoccupied with comforting a sick child who we had not seen in a month. If it was that big of a deal to you, surely you could have switched with your ex-husband- I am sure he would have happily relayed any information the doctor’s gave.
About the form for child support garnishment – first of all I have never modified your DIVORCE PAPERS it would be IMPOSSIBLE for me too do that. What my husband and I decided to do was clarify a child support form that you had filled out incorrectly. You filled the form out as saying that the original divorce case name is “(The name we both go by) + my husband’s Last Name vs. My Husband’s Name”. If you would look over your divorce decree, you would see that the case name is “(The Name we both go by) + Your Maiden Name vs. My Husband’s Name”.
As you cannot “white-out” carbon copy forms, we were forced to scratch out what you originally wrote because it was so incorrect it would cause problems and delays. We also added (and I say “we” because my husband was right there and the only reason I wrote it was because my handwriting is neater) “NKA [your most recent married name]” because that IS your new legal name. As the state will be making the child support check out to you now (since you obviously can’t be trusted with us giving you money directly) we did this for your benefit. It was important to clarify the document, especially since we unfortunately go by the same name (your first name, my middle name)
Adding a “Now Known As” name is a common legal practice when clarification on names are needed. My Husband and I have both worked for lawyers and are aware of such practices, additionally, OUR lawyer doesn’t see any harm in clarifying the name issue. I ASSURE you that you should not fear that this would as you said in your email “jeopardize the legality of your divorce papers”. This has NOTHING to do with your divorce. Your divorce from my husband has been finalized for fucking ever, a form not up to your standards will not make everything null and void. It makes you look ignorant to state otherwise. The Form in question is ONLY about child support. Worst case scenario, that form would need to be filled out again. Obviously, you haven’t submitted the form yet, otherwise you would know this.
I understand you feel that I clarified your name on that document because (as you said in one of your 100’s of nasty/snide/bitchy/controlling/uncalled for text messages to my husband) I “can’t stand [you] still having that name”
Hate to break it to you, “(the name we both go by) + Husbands Last Name” is not my name. Legally, my name is ” My first name (that you don’t go by) +Maiden Last Name + Husband’s last name”, I just GO by the same given name. I did this SPECIFICALLY to avoid being confused with you in ANY official capacity. The name you originally filled out is not your name anyway, so why would I be jealous of you “still having that name”?
Explain to me what “major decisions” I think that I can make regarding the kids and your divorce? Your child support amount has not changed. I put my foot down about you demanding almost $300 more a month in child support, in addition to school fees AND health insurance AND so on. (we are required to keep medical insurance on the kids, but because neither I nor my husband are eligible for a group health plan, technically we are allowed to subtract the premium from the child support – so we give you extra anyway!)
I did not appreciate you being stupid enough to believe that an online “child support calculator” was a legally binding contract, nor do I appreciate you being greedy enough to tell my Husband that is what he had to pay, just because you KNOW that he would do ANYTHING for those children and is so used to walking on eggshells around you for fear that you will fly off the handle and hurt those children.
We could not afford to ultimately contribute almost $1500 per month to what is essentially tax free income to your household when we barely make ends meet in ours. Our lawyer said that the law is on Husband’s side on this one.
Besides, how is it that I cause drama over money and kids decisions when it was YOU who made the decision to claim BOTH of my Husband’s ONLY children on YOUR TAXES without informing us ahead of time? It would not have been a big deal for you to claim both children for the 2008 tax year IF YOU HAD NOT BEEN SELFISH ENOUGH TO ALLOW THE FATHER OF YOUR CHILDREN TO PROPERLY ADJUST HIS W-4’s. Feel Guilty? You should. He has ALWAYS gotten to claim ONE of his children on his taxes. It was not your place to unilaterally change this arrangement without his input.
As you pointed out in your email Husband and I are married now, and I KNOW I have legal rights, regardless of what you say, and that includes having a say in all major decisions that affect my household. I do not try to force him to make decisions regarding the children beyond the basic parenting stuff that goes on during our visitation time (I.e. this is what you are wearing to Church and Lollipops do not count as breakfast and baths are not optional or throw a tantrum, get time-out) and I resent your constant implications that he “doesn’t take care of his own issues”.
It pisses me off to no end that you deem yourself the “End-All-Be-All Keeper-of-the-Holy-Functioning-Uterus-of-Entrapment” and feel that you have the right to tell me what makes my Husband happy. You are such a Hypocrite. OBVIOUSLY you COMPLETELY failed as a wife to him, now you just want to point out what you feel is wrong with OUR marriage because you are jealous that you don’t have what we have.
You may be married, but you have NO CLUE how to love or be loved. You just know how to use and manipulate people. I feel sorry for you.
I am sick of the drama. YOUR DRAMA. I am sick of your casual lies; I am sick of your “innocent suggestions” and “heartfelt concerns”; I am sick of you thinking that you can talk like are your crazy ass is still married to MY HUSBAND. I am sick of you thinking that you have ANY RIGHT WHATSOEVER to give advice to me. You’re lucky MY HUSBAND doesn’t feel the need to give YOUR HUSBAND honest advice about his marriage to YOU- because I know it would start with “RUN, don’t walk, GET OUT WHILE YOU STILL CAN”. MY HUSBAND can see the signs already. It’s obvious that you haven’t learned from your mistakes. YOUR HUSBAND is doomed. That poor man acts like a kicked puppy when you’re around.
You were SO mad when MY HUSBAND proposed to me. You fucking LOST it when you saw the ring he gave me. Poor BOYFRIEND OF 3 WEEKS WHO IS NOW YOUR HUSBAND had to go out and buy you a ring too, it just had to be bigger than mine (it’s SO fake by the way – it doesn’t even sparkle right.) You even moved your wedding date up FOUR MONTHS for no particular reason just to get married before we did! Honestly, who gives themselves a WEEK to throw together a wedding? How tacky is it you always INSIST on getting married right before Christmas when weddings aren’t supposed to be solemnized during Advent? It’s just creepy that you got married so close to your previous anniversary. And you even made the kids go home early from our wedding out of spite, they were crying because they didn’t want to leave!
Not every one in this world is going to bow to your soul-less, ugly, ignorant, slack-jawed, beady-eyed, fat-assed, mouth-breathing bullshit, just because they are afraid of you. I don’t give a shit that you’re bipolar, I don’t feel sorry for you because of it and I know that I don’t owe you anything because you popped out a couple of kids. I am not beneath you and you do not have the right to tell me or my husband how you feel about me or our marriage. Nobody likes you. Get used to it.